By Caroline Petersen
October is drawing to a close, but fear not. To celebrate this spooky month, we get to celebrate with Halloween. The anticipation has been intense; the patience has been minimal. Finally, it is time to throw on your Halloween costumes which you’ve been planning all year. If you’re still troubled for fresh, horrifying ideas that will knock the socks off your friends, here is a list of truly terrifying options for Halloween outfits.
1. The Bee Crisis
For real guys, when the bees go, WE GO. Our handy pollinators are on the decline. We do not give them enough credit – they do a fantastic job pollinating, spreading, growing more flowers, and most importantly making honey. So many flowers, one concerned bee.
Pesky things aren’t they? The sad reality of adulting is scarier than any ghoul or demon. What better way to represent this scary rite of passage than being the epitome of adulting itself: bills.
3. Student debt
Very topical for the campus political climate at the moment. This heavy burden to bear will give everyone a little laugh, but most importantly, a sad sinking reality and hopelessness. Wow look at you, ruining a party in 0.25 seconds.
4. White Privilege
Who knows what one could get away with with white privilege. The possibilities could be endless. The power over the media, the power in the White House, the power in appearance?! Goosebumps!
5. Netflix & Chill
All you wanted was to check out some cool movies on Netflix and now some dude is trying to pull the moves on you? This, in all honesty, is one of my greatest fears. As 2017’s awarding winning movie would suggest: GET OUT.
6. Men (who are trash)
We all remember this important movement that made its rounds on social media, highlighting the nature of men to be violent, abusive, misogynistic, and very dangerous. However, there were always the few who loved to point out that they, in fact, are not trash. They are “good guys.” They are, as the lovely example below points out, “God’s gift to womxn.” Yet, they’ll totally let rape jokes pass in the locker room.
7. One Night Stands
It’s always a little awkward; you both know what you want but don’t know when it’s time to be ridiculously forward. Questions racing through your mind while you’re trying to have a good time: “I hope they don’t think this is serious!” “They’re not going to sleep over, right?” “If they do, do I make them breakfast as a thank you?” “WAIT WHAT NO.” Anxiety and awkwardness are a perfect recipe for a real fright night.
The gift that keeps on giving. And no, you’re not getting a new laptop or brand-spanking new sneakers you’re getting lemons.
9. Being Excluded & Rejected
Any flashbacks to high school anyone? Nothing worse than scrolling through Snapchat stories and seeing all of your friends hanging out on a Friday night. Every single one of them…except you. What better way to showcase this saddening reality than dressing up as the ultimate reject: Pluto.
10. Donald Trump
No explanation needed. If you’re struggling to introduce yourself to other Halloween partygoers, here is a handy list of options: Agent Orange, Cheeto-In-Chief, The Fanta Fascist, Hair Furher, Trumpty Dumpty. Have fun.